Hands down, the worst night's sleep in recorded parent history

Ah, where to begin? Perhaps some back story is in order.

There are many factors that combined to create the disaster that was last night. We attended a brunch and Claire & Aeron had a great time playing with other kids, and other kids' toys. Then we came home and spent the afternoon in the back yard; Miles and I were weeding and the girls and Cam were having a gay ole time digging in the dirt, whacking trees with garden implements, and climbing the fence, etc. Aeron kept throwing rocks at her daddy, the naughty thing... As a result of all this thrilling activity, the girls didn't nap yesterday, so by 7pm, they were exhausted, sobbing wrecks. Once they settled down, they were out like a light. In addition, Aeron has had a cough. It's getting better, she's not really sick; it's most likely a post-nasal drip thing.

Then there is the pissing contest between Kayla and Mitzi. Literally. Kayla's been gone a lot, as the Templeton Mock Trial Team is gearing up for the big competition. Mitzi, for reasons of her own, has been using Kayla's bed as a litter box. As you can imagine, this makes an already tense and irritable Kayla still yet more irritable. She didn't have the time or the will to deal with the problem on Friday and slept on the family room couch. So, Kayla got home yesterday evening from an away scrimmage that had lasted all day and she was beat. She threw her bedding in the wash, then flopped on the sofa bed in the living room and was instantly asleep.

OK, so, three kids down, one left. Cameron and his dad were in the family room, playing with Cam's Mindstorm set. (Think robotic Lego's). The boys had a grand time and Cam was in bed by 10:30. Miles joins me in the bed, we're both reading a book with a glass of wine, and peace descends on the house.

That's when the fun began.

Aeron started to cough. She'd cough for bit, there'd be a pause, then she'd cough some more. After a couple rounds of this, she began to cry/whine. I can't remember which of us went first, but one of us went in to her and came out carrying Aeron back to our bed. She'd snuggle for a bit, falling back to sleep, then Miles would carry her back to bed, prop her up on her reading pillow, cover her with Pink Blanket and give her Blue Bear to cuddle.

We did this three more times by midnight. The cherry on the sundae? Kayla, whose sleep has been disrupted, asking me from her position on the living room sofa, in that teen-age tone of voice (the one that seems to say, "why are you so stupid?!"), "Jen, why don't you give her a drink of water or some cough medicine?!" I don't recall what I answered, but I'm quite certain it wasn't polite. Then Miles suggested I turn up the heat, maybe that would help Aeron sleep. The nut sprinkles on top? I checked the thermostat; someone had turned the heat off. It was 64 degrees. I turned it back on and that seemed to make the difference.

About an hour later, Claire woke up, discovered she'd had an accident and came sobbing into our room. She was most distraught because Purple Blanket was wet. I handled this one, leaving Miles to snooze. So I clean the girl up; get her new jammies, tuck her back in, find an acceptable replacement for Purple Blanket, swear to the child I'll wash Purple Blanket tomorrow. While I'm in their room, I prop Aeron up on her pillow, just for good measure.

So now it about 1:45am and I'm wide awake. I noodle around on the internet for a bit, have a couple of pieces of medicinal chocolate, then head back to bed. I'm just getting back to sleep when I hear someone ratting around downstairs, going in and out of the garage. Next I hear someone snarling, then someone stomping up the stairs. Kayla stands in darkened doorway to our room, and loudly, and disgustedly declares, "Mitzi just peed on bed! While I watched! I'm so mad!" then stomps off.

Miles tells me that he was awake for a couple of hours after that. I managed to get back to sleep, eventually. My husband, hero that he is, still managed to get up and get all the kids to church. I, on the other hand, helped get the little girls dressed for church, then collapsed back into bed and slept 'til 2pm.

I love my children. Really, I do. I just wish they'd let me sleep.