Tuesday, December 20, 2011

I rearranged the furniture

I'm one of those.

Some women won't leave the house without makeup. Some people can't stand even the suggestion of dirt on their floors.  Me, I rearrange the furniture. Move art around on the walls. Dig up plants and plant them in a different spot. Some people think I'm nuts. (hi, Terry!)

I got bored with the look of my blog and started dorking around with it. Also, the title, while venerable, is a bit wordy, so that got edited as well.

Let me know what y'all think.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Well. Glad I asked.

Great news! I am officially fused. Saw my surgeon today and he looked at my X-Ray, said I was doing excellently well and he never wanted to see me again. And since the only reason me and this fella ever hooked up in the first place was chronic, debilitating, agonizing pain, I am perfectly OK with him dumping me like this.

During question and answer time, and since the guy does have a medical degree, I asked, "So. Why do kids always barf in the middle of the night?" Without turning a hair, the nice neurosurgeon said, "Hormones".

Turns out, as part of the diurnal cycle, some hormone drops in the wee hours and this reduces some kind of pressure and if there is any inclination, then starts the horking. "They're not doing it just to be ornery."

Huh. Good to know.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Song stylings by Clairezie Clark

"Now we know our daily peril!
Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la la!"

Barfing at 4am

Of all the many joys of parenthood, one of the most wonderful is the Barfing Child in the Middle of the Night.

It must be a rule somewhere. They must start throwing up in the small hours. Under no circumstances is the sick child to start the barfing at a reasonable time, like, say 8pm. No, they have to wait until the parents are sleeping and defenseless, and perhaps, have had a glass of wine or two.

Early this morning, Aeron got out the Kid Playbook, and followed it, right down the line.

Miles and I had been to a Christmas Party with old friends. The girls had spent the evening with Kayla, attempting to make a gingerbread house. (A fail, unfortunately. Not enough structural integrity.) We were home by 9:30pm or so, and had put the girls straight to bed. All seemed well. Us 'rents had retired to bed, each with our own book and lights were out by 11pm.

Scruffy, the newest addition to our family, was being difficult, wanting love at the same time I wanted sleep. So, he got chucked out of the Boudoir and the door was closed behind him.

The first sign of trouble was the muffled sound of crying. Which then got a lot louder at the kid opened the door, and staggered into the bathroom, throwing up the whole way.  I will spare y'all the details. Let's just say, we needed to use the shop vac, and leave it at that. (Hi, Tom! We were thinking of you, but decided not to call...)

Poor Boo was sobbing and yucky. I got her cleaned up and changed into clean jammies as Miles attended to carpet-cleanup.  After the child was tidyed up, she was still upset and not sure she was finished barfing. So, I sat with her on the bathroom floor and tried to calm her down. I wasn't having much luck, even with the help of Blue Bear, when Scruffy came to see what all the fuss was about. He surveyed the scene and then crawled up in Aeron's lap, purring his brains out. She was instantly diverted, petting and snuggling the warm, thrumming teddy bear in her lap.

When I put her back to bed, the cat followed and jumped up to lay down on her bed next to her, purring loudly the whole time.

The poor kid has been throwing up every hour and a half or so since. She can't even keep anti-nausea meds down.  And then she looks at me and says, "Mama! I haven't even had breakfast or lunch and I'm soooo hungry!"

Thursday, December 15, 2011

While Christmas shopping....

Me: "There's a 'Barbie in the Bathroom' set. Would you look at that? She even comes with a pastel toilet."

Him: "It's 'Poopin' Barbie!'"

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Follies on Ice

Last weekend saw the entire Clark Clan in San Francisco. We shop, we eat and we ice skate!


Sunday, December 4, 2011

Morning Repartee

Upon being awoken by the sound of small girls barking like excited puppies.... 

Me: "I was dreaming I was having a very earnest discussion with the King of Bhutan about sexual equality."

Him: "Oh, yeah? Where'd he come down on the issue?"